Wednesday, August 14, 2013

It Gives You Wings

Despite what most people think, people in the military don't make a lot of money. It's not this grand paycheck every two weeks.

It pays the bills and puts food on the table, so we are grateful for that and know how lucky we are.

But, we have decided that I am going to take on a full time/ part-time job. (I say both because really, the hours set are ambiguous.)

I start Thursday.

It's nothing serious, just a waitressing job. (Really all you can do when you are a year out from finishing a degree.) But waitresses in Cali make minimum wage plus tips and the location I am working at doesn't tip share and I only tip out the bartender and occasionally the hostess. So that means I get a few hundred every two weeks plus the majority of my tips.

We can put my entire paycheck into savings and use my tips for the extra stuff that always comes up after payday.

In the end, we are saving not only my paycheck, but part of Daniels as well.

We are all about saving money these days and it's just not possible for us to save money on the military paycheck alone.

A part time job really just helps the situation and because I will be working nights Gracie won't have to be in daycare and will only ever have to be watched by a friend for 30 minutes - 1 hour before Daniel gets home.

However, there are some huge downfalls to this that make me nervous.

1.) I have never gone without saying "goodnight" to Gracie in her whole entire life. Never. It breaks my heart to know I am going to miss her nightly routine for half the week. I can't tuck her in, give her a bath, read her a just makes me sad to think about. Grace also gets night terrors every now and again and the only one who can calm her down is me. The thought of her screaming for me and me not being there...tears. Lots of tears. Missing her is the #1 pitfall to this plan.

How could you not miss this face?!

2.) Because of the place I will be working, there is a good chance I will be working till 3 am on some nights. Daniel gets up for work at 5 am. I leave for work before he gets home. That means I will literally only see him as I climb into bed. We don't get enough time together as it is and that would really really really suck. I try to keep in mind I probably won't be working ONLY the later shift, so it won't be happening all the time but it will still suck to only see my husband for two hours in two days.

3.) My babysitter that I had lined up basically bailed on me. Completely forgot that I had this long discussion with her about it. I don't want to get into too much of that because to be frank, it ticks me off the lack of respect that was shown. I made a point to get childcare figured out BEFORE I even started applying anywhere. I wanted my bases covered. I was being responsible and awesome. Now I am scrambling like a mad idiot to find someone else and it makes me look totally irresponsible and I hate that more than most things.

4.) The pressure to make sure the house is clean, the laundry is done, and dinner is either made and waiting for Daniel when he gets home or on at least sitting out for him to make, making sure Gracie is 100% ready to be fed, bathed and put down for bed when he comes to get her, and (the most important thing to me) is making sure I get enough really good Gracie time in during the day, is super daunting. To have to deal with that stress on top of then going to work. I feel that stress anyway, but knowing I won't be home to help at all, makes me nervous. I still want to be a good wife, even when I am not there. And I love Daniel to pieces but I know that if the house isn't clean when I leave, it's not going to be clean when I get home.

But with every bad there is a lot of good.

As badly as I will miss Gracie, which is a crazy amount, it will be good to get out of the house every now and again and only have to focus on schlepping alcohol instead of worrying about how I am going to get my kid to eat food other than pretzels & milk.

The extra money is really going to help us in so many ways that I am excited to be able to contribute something financially that will take some of the stress of myself and off Daniel. It doesn't make us comfortable but it gives us a lot more wiggle room to be able to nice things every once in awhile, save money, and pay extra bills.

I feel good about doing something that will be hard, but doing it anyway because it's what is best and what is the responsible thing to do for our family.

This will be a good thing in the end, and as long as I keep it my mind that this is for forever, just until we move, I think everything will be okay.


  1. Your attitude is so brave and courageous. You go, girl.

  2. You're so awesome, I know you will kick butt at making it work. Congratulations on the new job. It might be tough at first, but it will be worth it. Man, I wish lived near you--I would totally take Gracie for you (which Joshua would just love!) Sucks to be states away!

  3. I bet in the long run it will be good for you guys, take off some of the financial pressure. I started working a second job before we left Utah, so I was working at least 50 hours a week and it sucked, but it really was nice to have that extra bit to go do something when I did get time with my husband. I hope you find someone to babysit for gracie! There are websites where people sign up to babysit...gosh I can't remember the name and it would be a total stranger in the beginning until you got to know them, but it might work out in the end.


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